i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Yeah we do. It needs to be like a good penis- long, substancial, and able to make people cry.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I air guitared a man's prosthetic leg on the bar to Bruce Springsteen. That's how it's going
Boredom is so much more tolerable when you're stoned off your ass.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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