I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
