My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
He felt like a one man threesome
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
3 2 1 whiskey
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Well, I currently have zero fuckboys and my vibrator just broke. A fresh start to May.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
Randomize
