morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Drake has all the answers
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
The night went downhill somewhere between the time I was triple fisting smirnoff and when I was throwing up in the yard in nothing but my bra while he talk to me about mashed potatoes
Randomize
