I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
then my gynecologist said "its like opening up buried treasure"
My brain is foggy with friends reruns and him licking hummus off my tits.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Yeah. Moral of the story: Don't mace yourself. It sucks dick.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
My husband just came over to kiss me and said, "careful, I got a block of cream cheese in my pocket"
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
Randomize
