You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Irony: drinking your pre workout supplement out of the cup your Krispy Kreme doughnut holes came in.
Randomize
