never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Apparently when your theatre teacher asks who the best actor of our time is, Nicolas Cage is not the right answer.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Same I threw up in 3 different cities already today
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
