Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
it's unicorns you uncultured swine
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Randomize
