"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
Grandma's bordering on serious shit show territory at this point.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize