i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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