She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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