At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
The drunk mom in a firefighter hat just told her to leave.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
The magician guy on probation is here at the bar. I'm gonna get him to show me a trick
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
