birth control should be required to get into college
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
You were carrying around a milk crate, randomly putting it down calling out 'praise be to the milk gods' and making people pray to it.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
I just turned down a booty call because I'm having a Star Wars movie marathon
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
