I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
They offered me pot brownies in 7 minutes flat. Imagine my horror when I had to be like, are those gluten free?
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
The shitshow that was last night is the gift that just keeps on giving
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
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