Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
Well shove his head down there and tell him not to stop til we have a new president!
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Drink drank drunk tankkkkn, LETS GO
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
He just compared fucking my vagina to a snow flake falling on his forehead: gentle.... I'm not sure if that's a compliment or not.
Randomize
