Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I only call her for sex and medical advice. She admitted she feels like a worried parent when her phone rings at 5 a.m.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
I think we need to stage an Intervention. Her Instagram is a call for help.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
