After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
It wasn't random sex though, it was almost a relationship, built on lies and sex
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
