Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
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