So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
You insisted that you sleep on the bear rug instead of the couch. You said it was lonely and you kept on petting its head.
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Mike's not allowed to drink vodka anymore. He couldn't get his temporary tattoos (stickers) to stick so he super glued them on.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
Randomize
