i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
This is your liver's 7:15 wake up call. Mandatory margarita popsicles after work today. Rule #71: no excuses, play like a champ!
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
I work 80 hours a week to prevent myself from just laying in bed and masturbating all day. It's a hands off strategy.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
