Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
guy just got out of the car at the drive in and told his girlfriend "fuck you and your taco" and walked off
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
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