trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
I think the taxi driver just requested me on facebook..... his name was george right?
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
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