Betty ford says i'm here all night
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
she passed on me to fuck the foreign guy. is there a manlier, slightly less gay way of saying "always the bridesmaid, never the bride"?
nope.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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