My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
you pissed in the sink and didnt realize it until it was time to wash your hands
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
I CAN’T BELIEVE YOU STUCK YOUR DICK IN CRAZY!
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