I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
its not a party unless mikie exposes himself
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
yes i am an adult who snuck out of my parents house to cuddle with a guy and then came home and listened to taylor swift. judge me all you want.
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
I AM COVERED IN FAKE BLOOD AND REAL CUM. I AM AWESOME
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
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