I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
I was watching porn and wanted to change the tab to another video to cum but I clicked the wrong tab and it was a gif of a dog but I was coming and couldn't do anything so did I jill off to a dog? I feel like I should be guilty
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
