they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I called him Han Solo during sex, he looked at me like he was mortified then I realized he came.
how many times in life can you be kicked out of a pizza buffet for vomiting on the food and insulting small children
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
you were making out with a girl because you told her you were part of Nsync
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize