Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
Got a minor my first day of college from the bike police. I'm gonna like it here
Simple revenge plan: break into his house and steal one shoe of every pair
Me too like the fact they didn't arrest me wants to send them an edible arrangement
when i was on the highway she passed out and knocked my transmission into nuetral with her forehead...that was an experience
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
