friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
are you watching the world series?
I've made out with alex bregman... so yes
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
Randomize