There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Update- I sold my hat to some drunk kid for 50 bucks. I used my earnings to buy beer on the way home. I realize to everyone else seeing me drinking on my balcony at 6am, I look like an alcoholic, but I'm thinking of it as a night cap
I just got a huge discount at GameStop for having tits. I win.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Benefits of having to stay in jail for the weekend: learned how to make my own make up out of colored pencils. Also how to make use of toothpaste for hair products. Downfall was probably getting hit on by a murderer. Only me.
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
You are free to stop by. I promise to keep my penis in my leather pants
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
