apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
