its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
cmon you know I'm perfectly capable of something that ridiculous 100% sober
My ex's girlfriend just invited me clubbing. Guess who won the breakup?
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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