i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize