i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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