a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
My nephew just came out playing with my moms vibrator.
Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
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