He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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