I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I found ecstasy taped in my armpit... thank you drunk Marissa.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Big girls don't cry they get day drunk
There's a patch of dead grass from where you would notoriously throw up after every good night in July. This summer was great.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
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