Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
