is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
You know we had a good night last night when today I opened up my Google Translate application and the language is set to Persian and the phrase to translate is "I want you to suck my dick".
Believe it or not I'm actually not the only person sitting in the back of the train covered in glitter and drinking whiskey out of an arizona iced tea can. Small world.
Instead of a hangover my body just feels like shame
That is a hangover
I would prefer a headache
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
i tied my phone to a string attached to my bra. i am NOT losing it tonight
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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