Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
I just woke up in my ex-boyfriends bed, with my new boyfriends jersey on. I love March maddness.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
A stripper just invited me to her daughter's birthday. Where did my life go wrong?
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Is there such thing as dick sucking teeth guards?
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
Randomize