even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize