due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Found my wallet. It was under my dresser with a note that said "good job you found me". Drunk me is an ass.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
So why exactly are your shoes in my freezer?
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
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