and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
You put your finger on my lips and told me 'the butt is nature's pocket'.
I don't remember that at all, but I stand by what I said
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
HE HAS CHALLENGED MY BADNESS. I MUST CONQUER ALL THAT QUESTIONS MY POWER. BRING FORTH THE TIT PICS.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
Randomize
