He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
Just fell off my bed trying to pose and take a nude for you. Probably broke my wrist
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Vagina status: the swelling is going down.
I have cats now. Five of them.
Have you considered starting a global domination firm?
Randomize
