I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
my dad just told me he found me on the kitchen floor saturday morning with a microwave dinner on top of me, fork still in hand. priceless
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Just had that moment when you realize the two drunk women shoving all their money down your clothes were your middle school teachers...
Hurry there's four guys dressed up as a bachelorette party, one has a condom veil and the rest are selling candy bouquets and asking if anyone wants to get laid for $5
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize