i already hear my dad disowning me
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
Not a chance. She stuck her hand under my kilt and she told the whole table I was indeed commando. She broke all the rules.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
we came into the house to find you doing shots by your self and when we told you to stop you locked yourself in the bathroom...
did I at least say anything...
you meowed at us and said you're a cat and cats drink for a living
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
Why does 10AM Spanish always turn into a discussion about my sex life?
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