ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
Should I be curious about Jeffrey randomly sending me a picture of him holding a crab, or just move on with my life?
There's a skull full of vodka. How bad can it be?
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Randomize
