Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
As shirtless as possible
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
Sometimes, being an adult means buying a bottle of whiskey after work and live tweeting the commercial breaks on food network.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
Randomize