No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
My first STD was from a foam party
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
tonight lets celebrate not being married
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Randomize