I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I really hope you get sexually violated by a pterodactyl tonight.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize