last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
I woke up and took my shirt off, and there was what I was assume to be pieces of tree in my chest hair. Any ideas about that one?
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
He told me he needed "space" but then goes and likes my insta of panacakes.. Done.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
Randomize